One of the worst cliches of any love story or romance in any sort of way, to me, is when one person in a relationship asks, "me or work." This cliche is really annoying and immediate degrades not only the person asking but also the story in general for me. It's very "old fashion" in the way that it's often the female lead who says "me or work" in these stories.
As we grow up in a (western) post modern era where the nuclear modern family is no longer the ideal model, this cliche just gets to me. Women can have their own lives, their own careers, their own accomplishments, etc. I don't know if it's just a cultural thing (East vs West?) but I rarely encounter this kind of cliche in western media now-most media is multi-genre so characters have more in their lives than the pursuit of love (I realize I'm essentializing and this in no way means such media no longer exists in the western world). I find a majority of shoujo and quite a number of josei mangas still portraying a uselessness of a female whose only aspiration appears to be just having a boyfriend and hence their schedules are completely devoted to the man who has a busy life. Ok, so these genres it's expected but I don't think it's much of a good excuse to be so one dimensional. Now, I don't actually read those mangas anymore but I was bored and felt like reading a random anthology manga. I suppose that is the reason why there is such a thing as light reading but it's one of the worst cliches ever.
The story in the anthology I was reading involved a girl who doesn't appear to have anything else worthwhile besides her boyfriend. The boyfriend suddenly keeps cancelling their dates because of work and I get that that's annoying when it happen a number of times without any warning from the person cancelling. However, she then meets him while he is busy working and closing up his shop and then says "me or work." I get that she wants commitment and the guy is at fault for this as well but when a story just presses the button on the cliche "me or work," it's just.....no....
I find that when this question is asked, it's often in context of the questioner not even thinking the question through before asking. If you devote yourself to the relationship so much and dared asked that question, (1) would you be happy if s/he gave up his/her dream for you? Knowing that s/he may live in regret and eventually hurting your relationship to the point of being irreparable? or (2) s/he might just dump your ass. (3) other consequences that can very well lead to sadness. In the end it isn't about choosing sides, These stories ultimately relay the message that it's important to compromise and to communicate. Also having a life of your own would help too.
Well that's all I'm going to say. This got a little long but I don't think it's a very coherent post since (1) I'm pretty tired (should take a nap) and (2) I didn't bother rereading it to edit.
No comments:
Post a Comment